McDonald's now more friendly to hedgehogs!

The British Hedgehog Preservation Society has successfully lobbied McDonald's into redesigning McFlurry cups to make them less dangerous to hedgehogs.

Seriously!

Wild European hedgehogs would get their heads stuck in the opening of the cups and would be unable to escape, leading to... unpleasantness.

(via boing boing)

Shouldn't the police station be seized as evidence?

...Goerdt also uncovered a dozen marijuana plants growing in western Duluth.

The pot wasn't growing off an ATV trail. And she didn't find it in the woods.

Goerdt found the marijuana growing in a planter near the front door of the West Duluth police substation.

In the Duluth News Tribune.

(via boing boing)

Although it's hard to see, he's holding a herring.

Although it's hard to see, he's holding a herring.
Originally uploaded by nekosoft.

Geocaching south of West Plains, MO. Nick and I got utterly covered with ticks.

States mentioned in Red Hot Chili Peppers songs

Pennsylvania
Alabama (x 2)
Mississippi
Louisiana
Indiana
California (x3)
Minnesota
North Dakota
Wisconsin
Ohio

How to clean up blood

Actually factually, I have no need of this information, but howstuffworks has a great page on the equipment needed for crime scene cleanup, including some factoids that are too groos to mention here. Ok just one: brain matter... dries into a cement-like consistency. This American Life did a nifty segment following a crime scene cleaner upper. Finally, the Iowa State University has a page that gives the following advice concerning decontaminating human blood: One part household bleach diluted in ten parts water is also an appropriate choice.

Scuba Skeleton!

Welcome to the Scuba Skeleton FAQ. This will answer any and all questions pertaining to Scuba Skeleton.
Document Created December 7th, 2002 - Last Updated August 26, 2006

---

Q: Why does Scuba Skeleton wear a SCUBA tank?

A: Scuba Skeleton wears a SCUBA tank so he can breathe underwater.

Q: What does FAQ mean?

A: FAQ stands for "Frequently Asked Questions" or "Frequently Answered Questions" depending on who you ask or who answers. It is meant to be an informative guide providing detailed information on a specific subject.

Q: When was the first SCUBA tank developed?

A: The first self contained underwater breathing apparatus was sucsessfully tested in 1943, although Yves Le Prieur introduced a very successful underwater breathing unit in 1925. The term SCUBA was coined in 1939 by Dr. Christian Lambertsen, who was working for the US military. Though the word itself is an acronym, most people consider it a word in its own right and omit the capitalization.

Q: What does SCUBA stand for?

A: It stands for self contained underwater breathing apparatus.

Q: Who invented the first SCUBA tank?

A: Although Yves Le Prieur introduced a very successful underwater breathing unit in 1925, Jacques-Yves Cousteau and Emile Gagnan developed the first modern SCUBA tank, called the Aqua-lung in 1943.

Q: Why would a skeleton need to use a SCUBA tank?

A: A skeleton would use a SCUBA tank in order to venture underwater further than it would be able to using a snorkel or a holding its breath (free diving). With special equipment, an expert scuba-diver can descend to the world record depth of 308 meters. Of course, Scuba Skeleton is certainly not as skilled as the diver who set this record in 2001, John Bennett.

Q: Is the guy who invented SCUBA still around?

A: Sadly, Jacques-Yves Cousteau (co-creator of the first Aqua-lung) passed away June 25, 1997 from a heart attack during his recovery from a respiratory ailment in his home in Paris. Born in November 1900, Emile Gagnan seems to be a footnote of history, for although he invented the valve that made SCUBA devices possible, his contributions were overshadowed by Cousteau's use and popularization of their invention. This FAQ's author was unable to find any information on whether Emile Gagnan is still living.

Q: Is Scuba Skeleton the skeleton of Jacques Cousteau?

A: Scuba Skeleton has a deep and abiding respect for the contributions of Mr. Cousteau to the sport of scuba-diving as well of his work to open the mysteries under the sea to millions around the world. Scuba Skeleton is not the skeleton of Jacques Cousteau. Mr. Cousteau's body rests in a family plot in Saint-Andre-de-Cubzac Cemetery in Saint-Andre-de-Cubzac, France.

Q: Is Scuba Skeleton the skeleton of Emile Gagnan?

A: While the Emile Gagnan was born in 1900, the author of this FAQ was unable to determine whether Mr. Gagnan is still living. Regardless, Scuba Skeleton is not the skeleton of Emile Gagnan.

Q: Does Scuba Skeleton also have a deep and abiding respect for the contributions of Mr. Gagnan to the sport of scuba-diving?

A: Yes, Scuba Skeleton does.

Q: Is Scuba Skeleton the skeleton of Dr. Christian Lambertsen?

A: No. In fact, Dr. Lambertsen is still very much alive. The Undersea and Hyperbaric Medical Society honored his lifetime of work at their annual scientific meeting last June.

Q: Was Scuba Skeleton in attendence at this meeting?

A: While Scuba Skeleton is not a member of the Undersea and Hyperbaric Medical Society, he maintains very close ties to the Society due to the nature of his work. Scuba Skeleton was unable to attend Dr. Lambertson's banquet due to a adventure off the coast of Borneo. Scuba Skeleton sent Dr. Lambertson his deep regrets and emphasized his deep and abiding respect for the contributions of Dr. Lambertson to the sport of scuba-diving.

Q: Is Scuba Skeleton a boy or a girl?

A: Forensic scientists are able to determine the gender of a skeleton from many features because human bones exhibit sexual dimorphism. In males, the skull is generally more rugged looking, and there are key differences of the brow, the chin, and the eye sockets. Additionally, the bump at the base of the skull (the occipitial condyle) is much more defined in males than in females, where it can be nearly invisible. In addition, the hip bones show a marked difference in male and female specimens, as the female pelvis is wider to accomodate childbirth.

Q: So is Scuba Skeleton a boy or a girl?

A: Forensic scientists are not always able to determine the gender of a skeleton due to age, wear, or decomposition. Although's Scuba Skeleton's skeleton is complete and free of decomposition these scientists were unable to conclusively determine gender from skeletal remains due to conflicting anthropological information. It may be possible that Scuba Skeleton's skeleton is comprised of bones from multiple skeletons, though this has not been proven either. In any case, scientists once observed Scuba Skeleton riding a boy's bike, and concluded he must therefore be a boy.

Q: Isn't gender just a social construct?

A: While it is true that technically gender is the way that people define themselves in their society and is only connected in part to the biological sex of the person in question, the author of this FAQ was using the term in its common, "folk" definition, which is interchangable with biological sex.

Q: Is Scuba Skeleton able to engage in biological sex?

A: Although Scuba Skeleton has been proven to be a boy, he has no genitalia and is therefore unable to engage in the reproductive act. Indeed, Scuba Skeleton has no skin, muscles, circulatory system, heart, lungs or organs of any kind.

Q: Could Scuba Skeleton drown?

A: Since Scuba Skeleton is familiar with the safety precautions assosciated with scuba-diving and is fully PADI and NAUI certified and accredited, it is highly unlikely he could drown. Nevertheless, Scuba Skeleton is aware of the dangers involved with undersea adventuring and would never leave a boat without proper equipment.

Q: What's in the scuba-tank?

A: Normally Scuba Skeleton's tank is filled with plain old compressed air, like the kind you and I breathe everyday. However, for extended dives Scuba Skeleton uses a special mixture called Nitrox, a gas with a higher oxygen percentage than is found in atmospheric air. Nitrox decreases the risk of decompression sickness and nitrogen narcosis during long dives. Scuba Skeleton also uses Heliox and Trimix, as described below.

Q: What is decompression sickness?

A: Decompession sickness (DCS) is more commonly known as "the bends" (athough tecnically "the bends" refers only to Type I DCS, the painful manifestations). It occurs from nitrogen bubbles forming in the bloodstream and all body tissues when ascending from a dive. Symptoms include mottled skin, a tingling in the extremities, shock and death. Once a DCS victim experiences death, there is usually very little that can be done for the patient. DCS can be avoided by ascending to the surface slowly, letting the nitrogen bubbles dissapate.

Q: What is nitrogen narcosis?

A: Nitrogen narcosis (often called "rapture of the deep") is an effect caused by a high-pressure inert gas acting on nerve impulses. The sensation is almost exactly the same as being drunk. In fact, there are deaths caused each year from divers diving too deeply and succumbing to nitrogen narcosis. For deeper dives, Scuba Skeleton uses a mixture of oxygen and helium called Heliox or a mixture of oxygen, helium and nitrogen called Trimix. Using these gasses, professional divers can dive deeper than 400 feet.

Q: Has Scuba Skeleton ever suffered the effects of DCS or nitrogen narcosis?

A: Although Scuba Skeleton remains vigilant of the effects of these dangerous syndromes, he cannot recall the last time he felt their effects. This is probably due to his vast scuba-diving experience.

Q: Does the helium in Heliox and Trimix cause Scuba Skeleton's voice to get all squeaky, as if he'd been breathing from a helium balloon?

A: Yes. Because helium is less dense the the normal atmospheric mixture, a person breathing a mixture that contains helium will find their vocal cords vibrating at a much higher pitch, and their voice will sound much higher pitched. Professional divers use vocal descramblers to communicate with each other.

Q: At all times? Even when they're not diving?

A: No, helium quickly dissapates from the vocal cords when a person stops breathing a mixture that contains helium, such as Heliox or Trimix.

Q: What are vocal cords, anyway?

A: Vocal cords are a pair of strong, fiberous bands of tissue located in the throat. As air from the lungs passes, these cords vibrate and sound is produced.

Q: Then how can Scuba Skeleton talk?

A: Scuba Skeleton's vocal cords vibrate as air from his lungs passes them. He can control the sounds these cords make using the muscles in his throat.

Q: I thought you said Scuba Skeleton didn't have muscles or tissue!

A: That isn't a question. A question is a sentence that ends in a question mark or is otherwise an expression of inquiry that invites or calls for a reply.

Q: Ok, does Scuba Skeleton have muscles or tissue?

A: Scuba Skeleton is a skeleton is therefore has no skin, muscles, circulatory system, heart, lungs or organs of any kind.

Q: Then how does Scuba Skeleton breathe?

A: Underwater, Scuba Skeleton relies on his scuba tank to provide him with oxygen, or in some cases Nitrox, Heliox or Trimix.

Q: How does Scuba Skeleton breathe when he's not underwater?

A: Scuba Skeleton breathes plain old air, like the kind you and I breathe everyday.

Q: But how does he breathe without lungs?

A: Underwater, Scuba Skeleton relies on his scuba tank. Above water, he has no need for the tank, but ususally wears it anyway, as it makes him feel comfortable.

Q: Does Scuba Skeleton have gills or something?

A: Scuba Skeleton has no skin, muscles, circulatory system, heart, lungs or organs of any kind.

Q: What does Scuba Skeleton eat?

A: Scuba Skeleton is a strict vegeterian.

Q: How does Scuba Skeleton eat?

A: When dining at home, Scuba Skeleton ususally settles down to a nice, relaxing dinner with candles and soft music. He will remove his scuba mask to eat, of course.

Q: Does Scuba Skeleton enjoy playing pinball?

A: Scuba Skeleton has no interests outside of scuba diving.

Q: Does Scuba Skeleton have a theme song?

A: Certainly:

Scuba Skeleton!

Having fun adventures under the sea
Otherwise breathing the same air as you or I
Fully PADI and NAUI certified
Always careful and therefore still alive
No skin, muscles, lungs or organs of any kind
But he's got a lot of heart, so he doesn't mind
And even though he can't biologically have sex,
For diving pioneers he has a deep and abiding respect
Scuba Skeleton

Some say he rocks
And he sometimes breathes Trimix, Nitrox or Heliox
Scuba Skeleton!

Q: Is Scuba Skeleton the skeleton of John Bennett?

A: No.

A final meditation on false celebrity

Alright: to round out the week and since even I'm getting tired of animals on specific forms of transportation (editor's note: not really, the author will never tire of that which is awesome. Never.) let's turn to a homegrown manufactured phenomenon: Rob Cockerham's trip to the mall. Rob, who runs the always entertaining and damned near always genius cockeyed.com held a contest this past weekend to see who could get the best paparazzi-style shot of him, his wife Stacy and their daughter June as they shopped at the Arden Fair Mall in Sacramento.

Top prize: $100.

About a dozen readers of his page showed up and made a polite scene throughout the mall as the family shopped for clothes and for whatever Pottery Barn sells. Other shoppers were caught up in the fun, asking "who are they?" and "why are they so famous?". Eventually people who had no idea who the Cockerhams were and why they were having their pictures taken were taking pictures as well. At the end of the designated hour the flashes stopped flashing and the lens caps were replaced. Rob went back to being a normal guy.

But here's the thing: Rob is, as I said, consistently entertaining and almost always genius. The photographers weren't there to maybe get a $100 paycheck, they were there because they love Rob Cockerham. A guy with a playful way of looking at the world and the flashmob paparazzi wanted to join in and play too.

Here's an article from the Sacramento News and Review.

Disappointing Box Office Results on a Summer Movie

Here's a link to everyone's favorite movie's box office results and here's an article from the same site discussing the numbers from said movie's opening weekend. Long story short: typical box office draw of any other summer horror/comedy. The internet frenzy did very little to impact the earnings from the inital weekend. I guess it remains to be seen if the movie has "legs".

Hedgehogs on a Motorboat

The Alamo Drafthouse in Austin has been sponsoring a film-making contest called Blanks on a Blank. Here's my new favorite, edging out Hedgehogs on a Hummer. The winner of the contest? Racoons on the Space Shuttle.

via still-justifiably-angry-with-me Candyland

Serpentes on a Shippe!

Then ther was a crashinge grete and terribil, and the sound of the sayles droppinge on to the decke. In the winde the ship did founder. Vp staires, Sir Sean did checke wyth the mariners and finde hem all y-slawe by the snakes, and the snakes had occupyed the wheel of the shippe and the mappe of navigacioun. And Sir Sean cam doun and toold Sir Neville and Sir Neville was passinge wroth and seyde, ‘That ys ynogh. I haue hadde it wyth thes cursed by Seynt George snakes on this cursed by Seynt George shippe!’

via Geoffrey Chaucer Hath a Blog via robotwisdom

Snakes on a Plane Tattoo

Snakes on a Plane Tattoo
Originally uploaded by ibgerd.

@

Snakes on a Shirt by a Guy Who Happens to be on a Plane

Jeffrey Rowland made the shirt that Sam Jackson wore in the video at the end of the movie and so he gets to be on the inevitable SoaP DVD. His aftermath is way way more aftermathier than mine.

Overcompensating has the whole story today.

(disclaimer: J-Ro is no less than eleven kinds of awesome.)

Snakes on a Plane Aftermath

Snakes on a Plane Aftermath
Originally uploaded by nekosoft.

A very bedraggled Erik after a week of installing windows in the sun and partying by moonlight. Made it to an opening night showing of Snakes on a Plane. Totally awesome.

Another Visitor: Epyx Remakes Classic Games

According to DS Fanboy,Epyx will be revisiting pre-eight-bit classics like California Games and Impossible Mission. It's going to be a remakes, but it sounds like the sounds and graphics will be updated rather than the gameplay mechanics.

Why would they need to update sounds like these?

On a related note, Epyx is also well-known for one of the best/worst controllers of the era, the 500XJ Joystick.

Mechanically speaking this thing is awesome: solidly built, autofire and microswitches on every directional in a time marked by soggy press-on-the-circuit-board controllers like the factory 2600 controller. Practically speaking the joystick is abysmal: it's nearly impossible for left handers to use, it causes hand cramps in all but the most ironpalmed and the microswitches made it sound like a roomful of Selectric typewriters. I'm sure I've still got mine around somewhere.

Image via vintagecomputing.com


While reminiscing, I hope someday Activision will rerelease Hacker and Artech will rerelease Ace of Aces.

Rail cache

P1010280.JPG
Originally uploaded by nekosoft.

Geocaching by a moving train (but not too close). Seriously the easiest geocache I've ever sought, but surrounded by what was probably poison ivy.

Whiter Castle

Whiter Castle
Originally uploaded by nekosoft.

A favorite guilty pleasure when traveling is unfamiliar chain restaurants. Now, technically speaking, I was familiar with White Castle before making frequent trips to St. Louis but these trips have made me intimately familiar. I'll grant you that this is not difficult at a restaurant where I could order one of everything on the menu and still be hungry, but N and I still going once or twice whenever we're in town.

This particular White Castle near Six Flags displays the secret to whiteness.

A Car-tionary Tale

So, as some readers/writers of this blog know, I recently acquired my first car. And then I gave it away.

Well, technically, I lent it to my girlfriend. In its place, I have her truck. Her truck is gianormous. In fact, it is the lordiest truck ever invented. Other important notes: it runs on biodiesel and has an automatic transition. I feel like Gregor Samsa whenever I drive it--those horrifying moments before he figures out that that actually is his arm moving.

I was driving this truck when suddenly, not a block and a half from my front door, it stalled. I tried to start it. Nothing happened. I tried again. Same result. I started to freak out, thinking everything from, "How am I going to get this enormous hulking piece of metal out of the intersection" to, "Oh god, I've killed my girlfriend's truck. I am so-o-o dead." About the time I lay my head on the steering wheel in an I-give-up-this-is-completely-hopeless gesture, I hear a slight tapping at my window. I roll it down.

Crack whore: Sweetie, are you okay?
Me: The truck won't start and I don't know what's wrong and and and
Her pimp: Try starting it again.
Me: (does so)
Her pimp: Do you have it in Park?

So, I put the beast in park and try it again. It starts right away. Then, they ask me for a ride, which I of course give them. To the crack house directly across the street from my house.

I can't wait until my little car with it's manual transmission and my girlfriend driving it return to me.

Snikt!

(via warren ellis)

Workplace Fantasies

Every since lunch (about 11:15) I have been reflecting upon my desire for pizza. Apparently, someone microwaved a piece of pizza before I came along to nuke my chintzy, plastic wrapped (but organic and vegan!) burrito. I was excited about the burrito...until I smelled the pizza. All I have been able to think about since then is pizza...pizza with a piping hot, soft, chewy crust, flavorful sauce (and lots of it!), covered with yummy, delicious veggies and perfectly melted cheese.*

I nearly salivated on my keyboard. Several times.

I am however grateful that the tuna fish and cottage cheese lunch obsession has ended. (I think it's a diet food because the pervasive smell makes you want to puke.) I'll take pizza-fantasies over a clothespin on my nose any day.

*I dream the impossible dream. Vegan cheese is immune to even minor solid/liquid state transformation. If one persists, half of it boils and the other half remains stubbornly solid and vaguely resembling plastic.

Overheard at the bar

Guy on his way out: You fellows want some deer sandwich before we go?
Z: (loudly and clearly) NO!
E: We already et!

My birthday is coming soon... I guess...

Once I have an extra four grand: Zero G recreational flights. Yes.

Nalgene Lantern

Here's a nifty item for camping season: a lid that turns one's Nalgene bottle (or other widemouth bottle, I guess) into an LED lantern. Nifty!

Basecamp has them for nineteen dollars. Too bad the color that I'd most like to use it with is yellow, the color I'm least likely to drink out of. I guess red would be pretty too... and preserves night vision.

(via Mighty Goods)

Edit: Nalgene is phasing out yellow! How will people know which bottle to not drink out of when winter camping or on river trips?

Logo Design

Here's a logo I whipped up for Leah's dance studio. REACH is not an acronym.

Virtual Hedgehog = Reality Cute

virtual hedgies love strawberries!

Three things that have recently made me weep openly

The February fifth installment of Something Positive.

Episode 294 of This American Life, Image Makers, specifically Act Three: Heart Shaped Box

The article An act of love, from the August 9th edition of The Guardian.

The most unfriendly "For Sale" sign ever.

P1010217.JPG
Originally uploaded by nekosoft.

This property
Owned by
Controlled by
Managed by
& Taxed paid by the
Stolba Group

If you would like to control & manage this property then you need to own it & pay the taxes on it. This property is priced at a fair market value of $10,000

"When people pry into others business, barriers are created. In a town full of barriers there will be no progress" Gary W. Stolba

This sign is the equivalent of a shopkeeper shouting "Buy something or get out!" This city lot isn't even that nice and the owners are so paranoid that someone is going to park a car on it or walk across it. And a quote from the owner saying "don't be so nosy"?

Also, on the left side of the sign there was a small, fake surveillance camera. The camera has since been stolen. This is such a strange town.

My Greatest Invention: The Magnetic Hat

Working atop ladders (as I often do) it becomes difficult to juggle the various saws and drills and hammers and such while climbing up and down. The worst is keeping the screws or nails close at hand while screwing or nailing. I hate keeping them in my mouth because they taste awful and probably contribute to heavy metal poisoning. Ladders make nail aprons impractical. So I came up with an invention. My crew urges me to patent it, but I'd rather share it with the world. I had my favorite floppy hat and some leftover Neodymium magnets left over from the LED throwie project. I made a magnetic hat.

Place a small handful of fasteners on top of my head and walk around all day.



I got this sturdy canvas hat at REI in 2003 to take a trip down to Mexico. The brass snaps and vent holes have a slight salt water patina. It also has five or six different colors of paint on it. This particular hat is no longer available from the REI web page.


The unique feature that makes this hat so suitable for magnetizing is the map pocket.


Inside the map pocket (very handy, by the way, for maps, money or anything flat) there's a oval piece of foam so that the top of the hat holds its shape.


The piece of foam is removable so I took it out and masking taped four magnets in a diamond pattern. These 10mm magnets came from Gaussboys, but United Nuclear stocks them as well.

I imagine that a person could tape magnets on the inside of any hat, but I like to remove the magnets before washing the hat so it doesn't stick to the inside of the washing machine. These magnets will lose their magnetism at about 180 degrees F so they ought not to be washed anyway.

It is important to keep powerful magnets away from cyborgs.

The small magnets mean easy release when I need a fastener but I would like to get a few more in the pattern so I could hold more stuff. As it stands, the hat will only hold a small handful of items. A bigger handful would be more useful.

My next invention will be a larger magnet that clips to the brim of baseball caps. It's so nice to simply reach to my head and have a nail in my hand without having to take off my gloves.

An author is me!

Amazon.com

1600590764

Very yes.

Eats, shoots and pays $2.13 million

A single superfluous comma has cost a canadian telecommunications company millions more than they expected. From the Globe and Mail:

Page 7 of the contract states: The agreement “shall continue in force for a period of five years from the date it is made, and thereafter for successive five year terms, unless and until terminated by one year prior notice in writing by either party.”

The validity of the contract and the millions of dollars at stake all came down to one point — the second comma in the sentence.

Had it not been there, the right to cancel wouldn't have applied to the first five years of the contract and Rogers would be protected from the higher rates it now faces.

“Based on the rules of punctuation,” the comma in question “allows for the termination of the [contract] at any time, without cause, upon one-year's written notice,” the regulator said.

According to USC professor Bart Kosko in this month's Wired Magazine: "The comma is on its way out". Noise is his latest book and it is comma free.

Why am I only hearing about this now!?

Imagine this: Alton Brown riding a motorcycle from coast to coast doing the roadfood thing. How cool! If your imagination isn't up to snuff there's Feasting on Asphalt is on Food Network: Saturday nights. So far in this episode Alton has eaten pork brain and teased bees.

Less than three forever, Alton!

Eh E, I Owe You (Sometimes... why?)

It turns out that there are dozens of words that have all the vowels in alphabetical order, the shortest one being AERIOUS. Make it into an adverb for aeriously (meaning airily, I guess). There's a whole page of vowel facts here including a whopping 34 more alphabetical vowel words. Plus a couple of words that use "W" as a vowel. I knew they existed!

Hooray for cwm and crwth.

You-know-whats on a you-know-where

In promotion for the forthcoming herptoavionics film Samuel L. Jackson's voice will leave a personalized message on your friends' answering machines. He doesn't curse nearly as much as he ought to.

Cool Lego Ads

Three more available here.

Camp Willow

P1010193
Originally uploaded by nekosoft.

Geocaching at the Civilian Conservation Corps camp south of Willow Springs, MO. The foundations that we found are what remains of Camp Willow, the homebase for the construction of Noblett Dam.